Stop making resolutions and start setting intentions
It’s a new year. Time to embrace a new YOU. Let’s make a list of all the things that we want to change. New habits, new mindsets, new routines. Let’s pick apart all the things that aren’t quite good enough and figure out how to make it better. Wake up earlier. Lose weight. Cook more often. Drink less coffee. Join the gym. Read more books. Be more organised. Make a budget. Spend more time with family. Get a promotion. Travel more. Journal more. Learn a new skill. You have to set deadlines, and track your progress otherwise it will never happen. This is your year to let go of toxic habits. It’s your year to be the best version of yourself. It’s going to be the best year of your life… Do you feel your heart racing, a tingle in your temples, or a churning sensation in your stomach? That’s not nervous excitement, that’s the weight of self-inflicted pressure building up inside of you.
Take a deep breath.
This is your permission to give yourself a break from creating
a new years resolution.
Setting goals and having aspirations is never a bad thing, and the start of a new year always gives us a fresh boost of motivation, yet oftentimes, we set ourselves up for disappointment by expecting too much from ourselves. We make commitments to goals that we think will add value to our lives, without reflecting on how much we’re already doing. Life is already full. You’re just about managing the day to day stress of being a high-functioning adult. So how about this year, instead of focusing on something you want to change outside of you, you focus on something you want to cultivate inside of yourself? After all, your relationship to yourself is the single most important contributor or detractor of your motivation for living a life that you love.
It’s time for a radical truth conversation with yourself. Here are some questions to help you reflect on the quality of your relationship with yourself in the last year:
How do you recharge and how often did you make time for that?
What took up a lot of headspace?
What brings you joy and how often did you prioritise that?
When were you self-critical and what did you believe about yourself?
How did you celebrate your successes and how often did you acknowledge your achievements?
What felt difficult and when did you procrastinate?
Have you been the kind of person you want to be?
Take another deep breath.
Being honest with yourself is always hard.
Remember that you did the best you could, and that is good enough.
Think about your answers and choose one that moved you the most. Perhaps you realised that you barely put your needs ahead of others and want to cultivate the courage to say no more often? Maybe you recognised that you didn’t speak up at work in fear of being ridiculed and you want to cultivate more self-belief? Or perhaps you acknowledged that your general outlook has been pessimistic and you want to cultivate more appreciation?
A powerful way to ground your insights about what you want to cultivate within you is to affirm your intention everyday. You can do this by writing down an affirmation that reminds you of your intention and place it somewhere visible in your space. Here are a few to inspire you:
I love, value, and respect myself
I will live in the present moment
I can see the goodness all around me
I believe in myself and let go of my fears
I will be kinder and more patient with myself
I don’t need to be perfect
I’m proud of how far i’ve come
Every day, take a few deep breaths and repeat your affirmation 2-3 times. Notice how your body fills up with peace and ease as you do this. You can also create an artwork using pens, pastels, paint etc. that captures the energy and power of your intention.
I hope this inspires you to slow down, be kinder to yourself and appreciate all that life has to offer at this very moment. And maybe your daily intention-affirmation practice will give you an extra boost throughout the year to make external changes when it feels right for you.